Baggage

Another portrait of a character from Investing in the Afterlife, Inc.. Baggage!

But of all the dunderheads that made up the English contingent, the one to the right was by far the most abhorrent. A drunken childless uncle at a children’s party, Baggage was the boors’ boor, barking his rancid opinions to make decent people wince. In the way some people boast of not carrying an ounce of fat, Baggage carried not an ounce of humanity. His mouth was a fearful cavity that cigarettes dreaded to enter for fear of catching cancer. The thought of his skin made his clothes crawl. His eyes swivelled independently, like a pigeon’s, the whites browned from the inside with spoors of nicotine. An advocate for yesterday as a solution for tomorrow, he ran with a myopic dream that the cap-doffers of yore should be at the service of the new money bullies, for whom no amount of riches was too vulgar and no level of privilege too excessive.